Friday, 18 May 2007

Cure for Hiccups

Same job today. I'm still picking the devil's teeth with poison in my guts, thinking anytime I want I can fart and kill it. I'm wrong, obviously. Devil senses something weird in his mouth, take me out of it and glance at me with charm. Sometimes I feel like fucking the Devil, but then my shift is over and I go back home. And wank.

Thinking if I split myself into 3, I would still get jobs for all 3 of them.

My workmate taught me something amazing today. If you hiccup, someone is talking about you. To make it stop, say the name of people you think is talking about you. When you say the right name, the hiccups stop. It worked twice!!
I'm going to an Indian to test the hiccup thing.


Indiguts said...

A good fart can kill anything.

La Sirena said...

I'm going to try the hiccup thing. Also, why do some people spell it hiccough? I think that's pretentious and annoying.

Indigobusiness said...

We danced around the hiccup cure before:

"Stick a finger up your ass, and call me in the morning."

Another link.

La Sirena said...

Sometimes it's easier and more hygenic to be vigiliant. For example, if I get the hiccups during a meeting, it might not be entirely convenient to start fingering my anus -- but it is convenient to start working names into the conversation.

Paula's method is portable, although yours is more, um, thorough.

Indigobusiness said...

It's not my method, but it's every bit as portable.

Just reporting. Can't vouch for its effectiveness. Practice makes perfect, I reckon.

tui said...

just hold your breath

dave bones said...

lean forward and drink a glass of water backwards. It works unless someone is talking about you...

Paulette said...


Paulette said...

If proved efficient, inducing hiccups will be the greatest method of self-promotion.

Anonymous said...

I the Darf Invader

motto over the luna eclipse

with a yellow submarine

and a sleepy hollow

under your feather pillow

i have a dream

2001 a space odyssey

Barry Lyndon echoes

with the bunnimen

pop is dead

god save the sex queen

confutati and maledicti


tabula rasa anyone?

No seriously, great topics, really interesting, you have there.